“As many of you know, I have been tasked with taking over here at the Ministry of Luck, where it is my job to manage Britain’s precious reserves of good fortune and make sure you always have enough luck to maintain your winning streaks and bag those jackpots.
“You see, what you may not know is that every time you win on any casino, slots or games, the luck reserves in the nation’s vaults are reduced a little. But here at the Ministry of Luck Casino, we know more than any other gaming establishment about how to keep you topped up with the luck you all want to keep on winning.
“Only through careful administration of our national luck farms and factories can we manage the resources of luck we so depend on to win all of the exciting slots and casino games we enjoy playing so much. Our partners in the bio-luck-tech industry are opening up new avenues of research every month to create more luck in labs up and down the country, while those workers in the established luck trades, like four leaf clover collecting and rabbits foot rubbing, are enjoying steady success in adding to the nation’s luck coffers too.
“So what better place to play than here at the only official Ministry of Luck Casino, where you can have fun and win as much as you like, safe in the knowledge that while you are winning we are working well into the night to keep the luck coming your way.
“But hurry now, because there’s only so much luck to go around!”
Minister for Luck